But of course, I have a moral obligation to The Nintendo Basement, so eventually I had to set aside Monster Hunter Freedom Unite (for Sony PSP) and have a go at the other game that arrived in the mail that day- Virtua Tennis 2009 for the Wii.

I’ve made it clear to everyone within earshot that I despise Grand Slam Tennis, EA’s ‘me first’ attempt to utilise Wii MotionPlus. I won’t repeat what I’ve already said (there’s a detailed blog entry about it if you’re really curious), but in summary I felt that the control system was extremely poor, even inferior to Wii Sports tennis in many respects (ie. having to press buttons for different shots), and was basically a demonstration of EA failing to live up to promises they’d made earlier. Virtua Tennis 2009 has been savaged by critics for its own poor attempt to utilise Wii MotionPlus, so naturally I was eager to compare the games and see for myself how they stacked up.

Virtua Tennis 2009 didn’t get off to a very good start. I went straight to practice mode and noticed that the coach was Tim Henman. Excuse me? I’m on a quest to be the best damn tennis player in the world, not some middle-of-the-road underachiever! I actually felt like I would do better if I skipped Henman’s tutelage and went straight into the game, but seeing as this is a Wii MotionPlus game, I wanted to test all the nuances of the controls so I could judge them fairly.

And I have to be honest, the early signs were good. For one, the automatic player movement seemed much better than in Grand Slam Tennis. On top of that, all of the shot controls were mapped to Wiimote movements instead of having to use buttons to differentiate between lobs and drop shots LIKE IN SOME WII MOTIONPLUS GAMES THAT SHALL GO UNNAMED, GRAND SLAM TENNIS. Speaking of swings, I occasionally noticed that, while your character would have a set swing animation, the ball didn’t actually fly across the court until you completed your controller swing. Graphically, it looked cheap, but gameplay-wise, it was promising. On top of that, while in training I tried all of the ‘control glitches’ from Grand Slam Tennis and they resulted in non-swings. Could this game come through and provide that great tennis experience I was looking for?

Pretty sure that's a foot fault mate.

Sadly, no. The training was all a pre-set façade in order to trick you into thinking the game had potential before revealing its true, crappy nature. Actually, I’m getting a bit ahead of myself- this realisation occurred during training, when I realised you had barely any control over your shots. Hey, Grand Slam Tennis may suck, but at least you can kinda aim where the ball goes if you compensate enough for the clunky controls. No such luck in Virtua Tennis. Okay, imagine having to do a forehand, as a right hander, in tennis. You know how swinging early makes the ball go to the left, late makes it go right, and in between makes it go in between? This basic rule of tennis physics is thrown right out the window here. In forehand training, I purposely swung early and the ball went to the left. I swung EARLIER and the ball flew off to the right. I did the same swing three times in a row, with the exact same timing, and watched in horror as the ball went left, middle, and right, and not even in that order. Also, the game utterly fails to differentiate between a regular forehand, a slice, and anything else for that matter. You can do a really slow swing for a drop shot, but an even slower swing will unleash a cracking forehand. And even though the game told me to ‘swing high’ for a lob, it doesn’t seem to work at all. Seriously, you can unleash dragon punches with the Wiimote until your shoulder pops out and the ball’s trajectory will remain as low as the level of anticipation for the Wii Vitality Sensor.

How dare you put me in this game!

But enough of Tim Henman’s useless training, maybe the proper game will pull a surprise and actually be good. Maybe, by some miracle, everything will come together in the proper game for a fun and fluid tennis experience. After all, training seemed to limit the controls so that you could only pull off the required shot for that lesson, instead of giving you the freedom to hit the ball wherever you wanted, however you wanted. Would it all come together when you were given the freedom to do so? To explain to you whether it did or not, let me explain to you those ‘control glitches’ (the ones that resulted in non-swings in training) from Grand Slam Tennis that I tested earlier, and whether they worked in a proper game of Virtua Tennis 2009.

Your player’s orientation doesn’t matter, you can swing a forehand or backhand and it will result in a good shot: Check.

If you bring the racquet back too fast (ie. anything faster than ‘really slow’), that will register as a shot: Check.

You can play the game well by pointing the Wiimote at the screen and waggling: A BIG FAT CHECK.

After attempting to play the game normally (and shot placement was still totally random), I tried waggling and watched as Federer engaged in a long rally with his opponent and won. WON! This is the biggest problem with these tennis games- they have Wii MotionPlus and they claim it’s going to get you off the couch and force you to swing for real. Unfortunately, what we get instead is some kind of MadWorld-esque Quick-Time Event, where you just shake the controller as hard as you can and watch as your character beats down on your opponent in a predetermined series of actions. This is not fun. This not a realistic approximation of tennis, by any means. In fact, if you watch a real game of tennis and shake the TV remote around, it will be an almost perfect recreation of Virtua Tennis 2009- I say ‘almost’, because this version would have better graphics and more interactivity.

Great piece of waggling from Nadal!

Just for the sake of comparison, I fired up Wii Sports and had a go at tennis, just to see if any progress, any at all, had been made over time. I was shocked to discover that, while Wii Sports tennis contains a lot of the problems of these current tennis games, it also contains a lot of subtle improvements. For one, it does a much better job of differentiating between different shots. For two, if you want to place your shot, you have to swing it properly. Seriously, I tried a lob forehand when my Mii was going for a backhand and it just sprayed out of bounds. I tried a lob backhand when my character was going for a backhand and it worked, every time! Late shots go where they’re supposed to, early shots do the same, and overall the whole thing is fun and playable.

Which leads me to the big question: Why? Why the hell are we expected to pay the cost of a full priced Wii game, plus an extra $30 for the Wii MotionPlus accessory (Wii CostPlus?), for something that was done better in a free game that’s almost three years old and had no extra accessories to work with? Why, I ask? Then again, when you’re dealing with the company that thought it was a good idea to make Sonic The Hedgehog transform into a werewolf to the tune of Bowling For Soup, ‘why’ is probably a futile question to be asking.

If you want a tennis game on Wii, stick with Wii Sports. If you want a Virtua Tennis game, buy one on another system with good ol’ button controls that actually do what they’re supposed to do. If you want a game that demonstrates the true potential of Wii MotionPlus, save your pennies for Wii Sports Resort and Red Steel 2. Virtua Tennis 2009 is a useless game that fails at everything it attempts and ends up being nothing to nobody. Do not buy it for yourself, do not buy it from the bargain bin, and especially do not buy it for a relative, because it’s flat-out awful. Even El Tigre on the DS was better than this crap.

By Mr_M

Graphics: B-

If you’ve played a Virtua Tennis game before, you know what to expect.

Sound: B-

Does the job I suppose.

Gameplay: E-

There are a couple of things that it does better than Grand Slam Tennis, cancelled out by a couple of things that it does worse. Shot placement seems totally random, and all of the problems that were present in Wii Sports still haven’t been fixed.

Overall: F

No matter who you are, this game will not appeal to you.

Wii Sports Resort features 12 different sporting events for gamers to take part in, including archery, canoeing, basketball and more. Wii Sports Resort also ships with the Wii MotionPlus peripheral, set to enhance the motion-sensing capabilities of the Wii.

Australian gamers will be able to get their hands on Wii Sports Resort on July 23rd.

In Bit Boy!! players control a cube called Kubi as he makes his way through a number of levels based on different console game generations. Advancing through the game reflects the technological changes of over 20 years of console gaming—from basic 2D graphics through to stages featuring complex 3D models and “photorealistic” textures. The game is controlled by tilted the Wii Remote up and using it as though it were a joystick.

Bit Boy!! is scheduled to release this week in Europe.

Square Enix are currently working on bringing the series to the Nintendo DS in the form of Kingdom Hearts: 358/2 Days, which is set for release later this year.

When Nintendo Power asked Nomura about the chances for a Kingdom Hearts title on the Wii, he stated that “there might be some room to consider that” when work has settled down on his other projects.

Previously scheduled for next year, Gamestop has updated the US release date for the title to November 17th, which means that Wii owners might get a chance to headshot zombies sooner than expected.

Darkside Chronicles is an on-a-rails shooter and the sequel to 2007’s Umbrella Chronicles. Set to feature settings and events from previous Resident Evil games, including Resident Evil 2 and Resident Evil – Code: Veronica, Darkside Chronicles will also shed new light on previously unseen aspects of the franchise’s history through a number of completely new scenes.

Despite the apparent change of the US release date, it’s still uncertain when exactly Australian gamers will get a chance to experience the Darkside Chronicles for themselves.

We Cheer 2 is a dancing game that requires players to use two Wii Remotes to perform a range of cheerleading routines to popular music. Among the tracks selected for the second installment of the franchise are hits from artists such as Lady GaGa (”Just Dance”), Rihanna (”Pon de Replay”) and Fallout Boy (”Beat It”), as well as a number of more “classic” hits such as Get Ready For This (2 Unlimited) and Toni Basil’s iconic cheerleading anthem, “Mickey”.

In an effort to broaden the appeal of the title, We Cheer 2 is also set to add male cheerleaders to the mix.

For the full list of songs, check out the official press release.

A demo of the upcoming DS game, Rhythm Heaven is now available for download, along with gameplay footage and a “behind the scenes” look at the development of the title. Rhythm Heaven has players tap and flick the DS touch screen in order to match the beat of music.

There’s also new footage of Cocoto Platform Jumper, an upcoming WiiWare port of a platformer previously released on almost every system under the sun (including the Nintendo GameCube), as well as a trailer for the recently released NyxQuest: Kindred Spirits, available now from the Wii Shop Channel.

Other updates include footage of Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Winter Games and a Wii MotionPlus trailer that features a bunch of very serious looking people playing sports. The Wii MotionPlus trailer also shows a number of scenes from the upcoming Wii Sports Resort; the game with which the peripheral will ship.

The Nintendo Channel allows gamers to rate games, receive the latest information from Nintendo and watch the latest preview videos of upcoming and previously released titles. It is available as a free download from the Wii Shop Channel.

The competition has been run, and 3 lucky winners have emerged! They answered the question:

If you were a Metallica band member, what would be your chosen stage name and why?

OK, so the winners were:

Michael, WA
I would call myself Elvis F***ing Christ. It’s a name that demands attention and respect. Also, due to the middle name, it would offend peoples mothers, which is something that Metallica haven’t been able to do for far too long.

Stephen, VIC
The Napster, to piss Lars off and because it’s not a half bad name.

Justin, VIC
Justin Millard, because Metallica don’t use stage names.

________________________________________________________________

And those were the three winning entries! Congratulations! All of you will be receiving a copy of Guitar Hero: Metallica Wii in the post shortly.

As for everyone else who didn’t win this time around, make sure to keep checking back on TNB for more competitions, and thanks for entering.

SimEarth: The Living Planet (800 points)
This TurboGrafx port of a PC title allows you to experiment with a world of your own creation, setting up a planet according to your specifications and then watching the creatures evolve. Let’s get one thing straight; Spore it ain’t.

Altered Beast Arcade (900 points)
Why anybody would bother shelling out 900 points for the arcade version of Altered Beast is beyond me, when there’s already a Sega Mega Drive version available on the service for 100 points cheaper. Arcade gamers are kind of like those guys that refuse to listen to music on anything but vinyl.

Wii Ware

Water Warfare (800 points)
This rather interesting title is an first-person shooter, where traditional firearms have been replaced by non-fatal alternatives, such as water pistols and pea shooters. Water Warfare not only offers single-player modes, but also enables players to play online against up to seven others.

Whether or not you’ll actually be able to find anyone online to play with remains to be seen, but if the simplistic style doesn’t deter too many from trying it out, it could be a surprise hit. At least it’s not just another puzzle game…

Puzzle Bobble Plus (800 points)
Probably the safest release this week is Taito’s Puzzle Bobble Plus! Called Bust-A-Move Plus in America, this derivative puzzler involves shooting coloured bubbles at, well, other bubbles in order to make them pop. Everyone loves a good puzzle game, but have there been too many?

That rounds up this week’s Virtual Console and WiiWare releases. If you plan on downloading any of these titles, be sure to leave a comment and let us know!

Wii Sports Resort is a first-party Nintendo title that will be designed to take full advantage of the Wii MotionPlus attachment for the Wii Remote. The game is set to ship with the peripheral included.

Check after the jump for some brand new footage of the Cycling and Swordplay games. Wii Sports Resort is expected to be available in Australia on the 23rd of July.